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quick tail?

I just got a spam email for “quick tail” and I thought to myself…how fast can it really be? I mean, if you want to do a quick tail then you fopen, fseek, then read backwards until you reach the specified number of lines and output them…right?
Well apparently the contents of the email showed that the spammer had the more “mature” idea of tail in his mind. Seriously, can’t you people stay on track and use tail in its proper context?